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  • May 24, 2013

News Roundup – Thurs. 5/12/11

The latest on the Tzeitung photo scandal, a new kosher cellphone, and more, in this week's News Roundup.

May 12, 2011
By Unpious.com Staff Writer

News and Media

A more tzniusdig version of the famous photo. (Free Williamsburg)

The poor Tzeitung got more than it bargained for when it photoshopped Hillary Clinton out of the now iconic White House Situation Room photo. Political analyst Taylor Marsh declared “The people who made the decision to rewrite U.S. history, including the publisher of Der Tzitung, have shown themselves to be part of the problem in this world…” The Huffington Post paskened: “altering photographs in this manner is in violation of Jewish law — it is a misrepresentation of the truth.” Jezebel readers wondered “So do they have another version of the paper for Hasidic women, with all the men photoshopped out?” (someone’s working on it). Der Tzeitung issued a non-apology apology for the impression that Hillary Clinton might be some Chasid’s object of titillation, then followed up the next day with, “Unbelievable incitement when a rotten heretic lowlife publishes the photo that omitted Secretary of ​​State Clinton.”

Partner, Israel’s second largest mobile provider, has introduced a new cell phone. Not only is it “kosher”, blocking access to the internet, camera, text messaging and sex lines, its interface is entirely in Yiddish. But does it electroshock you when you speak lashon hara? It doesn’t?! We think a fatwah is in order here….

Hundreds of Montrealers celebrated the birth of Israel on Tuesday. Also present, a dozen Chasidim carrying signs that stated: “Real Rabbis have always opposed Zionism and the State of Israel.” Ah Chasidim, in your delightful costumes, your historical reenactments, your mythology that dictates it is sinful to put on your right shoe before your left. Who else is as perfect an arbiter of all that is “real”?

________________________________________________________________

News Roundups appear every Thursday (or when our News Roundup writer gets around to it, whichever comes first). Send news tips to unpious.editor@gmail.com.

Disclaimer: Unpious.com is neither fair nor balanced. We are totally partial to snarkiness, cynicism, sarcasm, and cellphones that can access sex lines.

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Tags: cellphone, Der Tzitung, Israel, kosher, photoshopped, White House Situation Room photo, Zionism

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Author: Unpious.com Staff Writer (103 Articles)

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